The Douglas
Psychotherapy Center
50 East Center St
Douglas, MI 49406
(269) 857-5444
contact@comeinandtalk.com


Psychotherapy, Psychoanalysis, Life Coaching
Adults, Teens, Children, Couples, Parents


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  1. Life Coaching
  2. Psychotherapy
  3. Psychoanalysis
  4. Consulting
  5. Public Speaking
  6. Postpartum Depression

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Life Coaching with Kim Richardson

Why do people seek coaching (vs. therapy)?

Generally, people seek psychotherapy when they can no longer manage aspects of their lives, or even all of their lives. They wish to alleviate suffering, understand the past and repair emotional wounds. As a therapist, I understand therapy to be absolutely essential at times to restore a person's well-being.

Coaching is designed to add greater value and satisfaction to your life. It is designed to bring great success to your business, relationship, creative life or professional life. It is optimistic; it looks to the future, expects results and depends on you taking action to achieve what you want.

Like all coaches, I assume that my coaching clients are whole, resourceful and creative, but - like all of us - need attention, encouragement and motivation to bring our best selves into being. Very often what is stopping you achieve what you want is you! People get in their own way by knowingly or unknowingly sabotaging themselves. Simply recognizing and understanding when you do this is enormously life changing!

How is working with a coach better than going it alone?

Coaches are experts at helping people get results. There are so many ways that hiring a coach to help you achieve your goals is more helpful than doing it alone. As a student in an ICF accredited coach training program, I have participated in 123 teaching class hours, 60 coaching hours, 12 supervised coaching hours and countless written tasks learning how to help you clarify, define and achieve your goals.

I believe the following 5 concepts and skills to have the most impact and as such I use them as the basis for my work with most of my clients:

Coaching is value-based.
As your coach I can help you identify your most deeply held values and articulate your life’s vision. Any changes you make need to be congruent with these things otherwise there will not be enough momentum to make difficult changes. A vision that is clear and real will draw you along towards it. Values that are uniquely articulated and real will propel you forward. As your coach, I am trained to help you discover, clarify and uniquely articulate your top 5-10 values.
With such powerfully meaningful forces pushing and pulling you in one direction, discipline and rules often begin to seem unnecessary and results happen without white-knuckling and internal conflict. Some would say results happen seemingly effortlessly when everything lines up.

Coaching is Realistically Goal Oriented.
Many goals (think New Year’s Resolutions) are abandoned because they are set impulsively, thoughtlessly and in the realm of fantasy and magical thinking. As your coach I will help you set SMART goals that are specific, measurable, attainable, realistic and time-sensitive.  In addition we will explore what it is you (not your parent, partner, boss or children) want for yourself. In setting these goals we will carefully consider what has and hasn’t worked before in your life and what is successful in the literature. Using proven methods to achieve results sounds like an obvious way to go about things, but when it comes to personal goals most of us are not that thoughtful and end up doing the same old thing year after year and still expecting different results. Phew!

Coaches Hold You Accountable.
When you work with a coach, you have someone who is truly invested in your progress. As your coach, I am not in competition with you, or secretly hoping you will fail so that I do not have to deal with your success! I am championing you and noticing when you are being who you need to be to achieve the results you want. I will notice you strenghting newly germinating aspects of yourself that have been ignored and neglected. I will affirm and acknowledge you for this. I will help you to notice and acknowledge these previously invisible parts of you. I will hold you accountable for the actions you said you would take and the homework you promised to do.

I am also hired to be honest and direct with you about what is and isn’t going well on your coaching journey. You can count on me to give you useful feedback that is thoughtful, respectful, sensitive and truthful. Feedback is always aimed to serve your best and highest interests, helps you become unstuck, deepens our connection and moves the coaching process forward.

Coaching offers new perspectives to old problems.
As your coach, I constantly hold the bigger picture. I can help you step out of the overwhelming details and self-recriminations, criticisms and judgements  to take in the meta-view. When you are less overwhelmed and able to calm down and see the vista from a new perspective, results appear far less unobtainable and impossible. When you believe in what you are doing, you are halfway there!

Coaching builds external structures, internal resources and self-esteem.
Providing external “structures” to help you stay on track is something coaches are trained to do. Examples of these might be records, journals, time-keepers, rewards, incentives, affirmations, a wonderful workspace, an exericize buddy  – anything that serves you by keeping you focused on your journey.
As your coach, I am also very attuned to the ways in which you (yes YOU) get in the way of your own progress. I notice your internal saboteur in your choices, speech patterns and in your actions, and even in your relationships. I focus on helping you notice when and how you abdicate power in your life by teaching you about four powerful unconscious patterns present in all of us. Once these become more conscious, and you take charge of them, your self-esteem is strengthened and enhanced. Achieving results and goals is that much easier.

When you feel good about yourself and trust yourself not to compromise yourself, you take yourself and your life more seriously; you like yourself better and you do what you need and want to do with your remaining precious time.

What are some examples of why people seek coaching?

People do not always know exactly what they want from coaching. Many times, people feel a sense of being stuck, or that something is missing from life. That is enough reason to hire a coach.

Others are more specific as to why they want coaching:

You are in a time of transitions: Transitions are stressful no matter how happy or sad they may be. If you are in a transition and wish to negotiate the changes that are happening to you and around you with the least amount of stress, coaching can be invaluable. In fact you may even wish to see the transition as a time for self-development, healing and would like to be able to grow and learn from the transition and know that you cannot do so without a fresh perspective. 
Examples of transitions are: retirement, bereavement, menopause, pregnancy, adoption, immigrations, job change, career change, college, empty nesting, divorce, leaving home, returning vets.

Something unexpected or entirely new suddenly demands all your resources: Examples of these kinds of things are: having a new baby, discovering an infidelity, a chronic diagnosis in yourself or a loved one, a life threatening illness, an accident, any kind of unexpected loss, needing to develop new skills for your job such as public speaking, writing a book.
Your learning curve is huge and the event demands all of your attention. To sweep it under the carpet would be unwise and yet you feel ill-equipped to deal with it alone. There are coaches who specialize in various niches. This means that they have the general coaching skills but they also have specific knowledge in their niche area. This may be due to an interest in this area or a previous profession in this area.

Difficulties with self-care.
Many people call on a coach when multiple attempts at managing their diets, finances, fitness, weight or self-destructive habits fail. As your coach, I will use all the tools in my kit to help identify exactly how you need to take care of yourself. We focus on habits that need to be created as well as those that need to be eliminated. Where addictions and life threatening behaviors are present, I can work in conjunction with other professionials and organizations you may need to be in touch wtih.

Breaking your own glass-ceiling – coaching for success! People often hire a coach to take them to the next level of their success whether it be in their personal, spiritual, family or professional life. As your coach, I am trained to help you define a vision for your life and brainstorm ideas without imposing your habitual limits on things. I am trained to get you to value your life and believe in yourself and your dreams. Defining these dreams, making changes necessary to realize them requires thought and planning and support.

To learn more about coaching, you can read through the FAQs below, compiled by the International Coach Federation (ICF).

Kim Richardson offers face-to-face or telephone life coaching to:

Anyone wishing to make changes, achieve results or negotiate transitions in their personal or professional life

Prospective parents - pregnant women, women considering fertility treatment or adoption

New parents - she works with new mothers helping them adjust to life with a new baby. For more info please visit newmothercoach.com

Parents with concerns - i.e. any parent who wishes to gain an understanding of and change something that interferes with their parenting effectiveness, and/or a parenting problem that interferes with the parent or child's personal well-being and satisfaction.

 

Is Life Coaching right for you?

Feel free to complete the following Coaching Readiness Questionnaire and/ or email Kim Richardson to schedule a free, no-obligation trial session that will help you decide whether life coaching would benefit you.

ICF's FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS ABOUT COACHING

1. What Is Coaching?
Professional Coaching is a professional partnership between a qualified coach and an individual or team that supports the achievement of extraordinary results, based on goals set by the individual or team. Through the process of coaching, individuals focus on the skills and actions needed to successfully produce their personally relevant results.

The individual or team chooses the focus of conversation, while the coach listens and contributes observations and questions as well as concepts and principles which can assist in generating possibilities and identifying actions. Through the coaching process the clarity that is needed to support the most effective actions is achieved. Coaching accelerates the individual's or team’s progress by providing greater focus and awareness of possibilities leading to more effective choices. Coaching concentrates on where individuals are now and what they are willing to do to get where they want to be in the future. ICF member coaches recognize that results are a matter of the individual's or team’s intentions, choices and actions, supported by the coach's efforts and application of coaching skills, approaches and methods.

2. What are the benefits of coaching?
Individuals who engage in a coaching relationship can expect to experience fresh perspectives on personal challenges and opportunities, enhanced thinking and decision making skills, enhanced interpersonal effectiveness, and increased confidence in carrying out their chosen work and life roles. Consistent with a commitment to enhancing their personal effectiveness, they can also expect to see appreciable results in the areas of productivity, personal satisfaction with life and work, and the achievement of personally relevant goals.

3. How can you determine if coaching is right for you?
To determine if you could benefit from coaching, start by summarizing what you would expect to accomplish in coaching. When someone has a fairly clear idea of the desired outcome, a coaching partnership can be a useful tool for developing a strategy for how to achieve that outcome with greater ease.

Since coaching is a partnership, also ask yourself if you find it valuable to collaborate, to have another viewpoint and to be asked to consider new perspectives. Also, ask yourself if you are ready to devote the time and the energy to making real changes in your work or life. If the answer to these questions is yes, then coaching may be a beneficial way for you to grow and develop.

4. What are some typical reasons someone might work with a coach?
There are many reasons that an individual or team might choose to work with a coach, including but not limited to the following:

There is something at stake (a challenge, stretch goal or opportunity), and it is urgent, compelling or exciting or all of the above

There is a gap in knowledge, skills, confidence, or resources

A big stretch is being asked or required, and it is time sensitive

There is a desire to accelerate results

There is a need for a course correction in work or life due to a setback

An individual has a style of relating that is ineffective or is not supporting the achievement of one’s personally relevant goals

There is a lack of clarity, and there are choices to be made

The individual is extremely successful, and success has started to

become problematic

Work and life are out of balance, and this is creating unwanted consequences

One has not identified his or her core strengths and how best to leverage them

The individual desires work and life to be simpler, less complicated

There is a need and a desire to better organized and more self-managing

5. What has caused the tremendous growth in the coaching industry?
Coaching has grown significantly for many reasons. Generally the world has changed a lot, and coaching is a useful tool to deal with many of those changes. For example, coaching is a great tool for today's challenging job market. There is more job transition, more self-employment and small business. Some of the real life factors include:

Rapid changes in the external business environment

Downsizing, restructuring, mergers and other organizational changes have radically altered what has been termed the “traditional employment contract”—companies can no longer achieve results using traditional management approaches

There is a growing shortage of talented employees in certain industries—to attract and retain top talent, companies must commit to investing in individuals’ development

There is a widening disparity between what managers were trained to do and what their jobs now require them to do in order to meet increasing demands for competitive results

There is unrest on the part of many employees and leaders in many companies—people are wrestling with fears around job insecurity and increased workplace pressures to perform at higher levels than ever before.

Companies must develop inclusive, collaborative work environments, in order to achieve strategic business goals, and to maintain high levels of customer satisfaction

In addition, individuals who have experienced the excellent results of coaching are talking to more people about coaching. In short, coaching helps people focus on what matters most to them in life: business and personal. People today are more open to the idea of being in charge of their own lives. Coaching helps people do just that; so the industry continues to grow.

6. How is coaching delivered? What does the process look like?
The Coaching Process—Coaching typically begins with a personal interview (either face-to-face or by teleconference call) to assess the individual’s current opportunities and challenges, define the scope of the relationship, identify priorities for action, and establish specific desired outcomes. Subsequent coaching sessions may be conducted in person or over the telephone, with each session lasting a previously established length of time. Between scheduled coaching sessions, the individual may be asked to complete specific actions that support the achievement of one’s personally prioritized goals. The coach may provide additional resources in the form of relevant articles, checklists, assessments, or models, to support the individual’s thinking and actions. The duration of the coaching relationship varies depending on the individual’s personal needs and preferences.

Assessments—A variety of assessments are available to support the coaching process, depending upon the needs and circumstances of the individual. Assessments provide objective information which can enhance the individual’s self-awareness as well as awareness of others and their circumstances, provide a benchmark for creating coaching goals and actionable strategies, and offer a method for evaluating progress.

Concepts, models and principles—A variety of concepts, models and principles drawn from the behavioral sciences, management literature, spiritual traditions and/or the arts and humanities, may be incorporated into the coaching conversation in order to increase the individual’s self-awareness and awareness of others, foster shifts in perspective, promote fresh insights, provide new frameworks for looking at opportunities and challenges, and energize and inspire the individual’s forward actions.

Appreciative approach—Coaching incorporates an appreciative approach. The appreciative approach is grounded in what’s right, what’s working, what’s wanted, and what’s needed to get there. Using an appreciative approach, the coach models constructive communication skills and methods the individual or team can utilize to enhance personal communication effectiveness. The appreciative approach incorporates discovery-based inquiry, proactive (as opposed to reactive) ways of managing personal opportunities and challenges, constructive framing of observations and feedback in order to elicit the most positive responses from others, and envisioning success as contrasted with focusing on problems. The appreciative approach is simple to understand and employ, but its effects in harnessing possibility thinking and goal-oriented action can be profound.

7. What should someone look for when selecting a coach?
The most important thing to look for in selecting a coach is someone with whom you feel you can easily relate create and the most powerful partnership. Here are some questions you may want to ask prospective coaches:

What is your coaching experience? (number of individuals coaches, years of experience, types of situations)

What is your coach specific training? Do you hold an ICF Credential, or are you enrolled in an ICF Accredited Training Program?

What is your coaching specialty or client areas you most often work in?

What specialized skills or experience do you bring to your coaching?

What is your philosophy about coaching?

What is your specific process for coaching? (how sessions are conducted, frequency, etc.)

What are some coaching success stories? (specific examples of individuals who have done well and examples of how you have added value)

8. How long does a coach work with an individual?
The length of a coaching partnership varies depending on the individual's or team’s needs and preferences. For certain types of focused coaching, 3 to 6 months of working with a coach may work. For other types of coaching, people may find it beneficial to work with a coach for a longer period. Factors that may impact the length of time include: the types of goals, the ways individuals or teams like to work, the frequency of coaching meetings, and financial resources available to support coaching.

9. How do you ensure a compatible partnership?
Overall, be prepared to design the coaching partnership with the coach. For example, think of a strong partnership that you currently have in your work or life. Look at how you built that relationship and what is important to you about partnership. You will want to build those same things into a coaching relationship. Here are a few other tips:

Have a personal interview with one or more coaches to determine “what feels right” in terms of the chemistry. Coaches are accustomed to being interviewed, and there is generally no charge for an introductory conversation of this type

Look for stylistic similarities and differences between the coach and you and how these might support your growth as an individual or the growth of your team

Discuss your goals for coaching within the context of the coach’s specialty or the coach’s preferred way of working with a individual or team

Talk with the coach about what to do if you ever feel things are not going well; make some agreements up front on how to handle questions or problems

Remember that coaching is a partnership, so be assertive about talking with the coach about anything that is of concern at any time.

10. Within the partnership, what does the coach do? The individual?
The role of the coach is to provide objective assessment and observations that foster the individual’s or team members’ enhanced self-awareness and awareness of others, practice astute listening in order to garner a full understanding of the individual’s or team’s circumstances, be a sounding board in support of possibility thinking and thoughtful planning and decision making, champion opportunities and potential, encourage stretch and challenge commensurate with personal strengths and aspirations, foster the shifts in thinking that reveal fresh perspectives, challenge blind spots in order to illuminate new possibilities, and support the creation of alternative scenarios. Finally, the coach maintains professional boundaries in the coaching relationship, including confidentiality, and adheres to the coaching profession’s code of ethics.

The role of the individual or team is to create the coaching agenda based on personally meaningful coaching goals, utilize assessment and observations to enhance self-awareness and awareness of others, envision personal and/or organizational success, assume full responsibility for personal decisions and actions, utilize the coaching process to promote possibility thinking and fresh perspectives, take courageous action in alignment with personal goals and aspirations, engage big picture thinking and problem solving skills, and utilize the tools, concepts, models and principles provided by the coach to engage effective forward actions.

What does coaching ask of an individual? To be successful, coaching asks certain things of the individual, all of which begin with intention….

* Focus—on one’s self, the tough questions, the hard truths--and one’s success
* Observation—the behaviors and communications of others
* Listening—to one’s intuition, assumptions, judgments, and to the way one sounds when one speaks
* Self discipline—to challenge existing attitudes, beliefs and behaviors and to develop new ones which serve one’s goals in a superior way
* Style—leveraging personal strengths and overcoming limitations in order to develop a winning style
* Decisive actions—however uncomfortable, and in spite of personal insecurities, in order to reach for the extraordinary
* Compassion—for one’s self as he or she experiments with new behaviors, experiences setbacks—and for others as they do the same
* Humor—committing to not take one’s self so seriously, using humor to lighten and brighten any situation
* Personal control—maintaining composure in the face of disappointment and unmet expectations, avoiding emotional reactivity
* Courage—to reach for more than before, to shift out of being fear based in to being in abundance as a core strategy for success, to engage in continual self examination, to overcome internal and external obstacles

11. How can the success of the coaching process be measured?
Measurement may be thought of in two distinct ways. First, there are the external indicators of performance: measures which can be seen and measured in the individual’s or team’s environment. Second, there are internal indicators of success: measures which are inherent within the individual or team members being coached and can be measured by the individual or team being coached with the support of the coach. Ideally, both external and internal metrics are incorporated.

Examples of external measures include achievement of coaching goals established at the outset of the coaching relationship, increased income/revenue, obtaining a promotion, performance feedback which is obtained from a sample of the individual’s constituents (e.g., direct reports, colleagues, customers, boss, the manager him/herself), personal and/or business performance data (e.g., productivity, efficiency measures). The external measures selected should ideally be things the individual is already measuring and are things the individual has some ability to directly influence.

Examples of internal measures include self-scoring/self-validating assessments that can be administered initially and at regular intervals in the coaching process, changes in the individual’s self-awareness and awareness of others, shifts in thinking which inform more effective actions, and shifts in one’s emotional state which inspire confidence.

12. What are the factors that should be considered when looking at the financial investment in coaching?
Working with a coach requires both a personal commitment of time and energy as well as a financial commitment. Fees charged vary by specialty and by the level of experience of the coach. Individuals should consider both the desired benefits as well as the anticipated length of time to be spent in coaching. Since the coaching relationship is predicated on clear communication, any financial concerns or questions should be voiced in initial conversations before the agreement is made. The ICF Coach Referral Service allows you to search for a coach based on a number of qualifications including fee range.

13. How is coaching distinct from other service professions?
Professional coaching is a distinct service which focuses on an individual’s life as it relates to goal setting, outcome creation and personal change management. In an effort to understand what a coach is, it can be helpful to distinguish coaching from other professions that provide personal or organizational support.

Therapy—Coaching can be distinguished from therapy in a number of ways. First, coaching is a profession that supports personal and professional growth and development based on individual-initiated change in pursuit of specific actionable outcomes. These outcomes are linked to personal or professional success. Coaching is forward moving and future focused. Therapy, on the other hand, deals with healing pain, dysfunction and conflict within an individual or a relationship between two or more individuals. The focus is often on resolving difficulties arising from the past which hamper an individual's emotional functioning in the present, improving overall psychological functioning, and dealing with present life and work circumstances in more emotionally healthy ways. Therapy outcomes often include improved emotional/feeling states. While positive feelings/emotions may be a natural outcome of coaching, the primary focus is on creating actionable strategies for achieving specific goals in one's work or personal life. The emphasis in a coaching relationship is on action, accountability and follow through.

Consulting—Consultants may be retained by individuals or organizations for the purpose of accessing specialized expertise. While consulting approaches vary widely, there is often an assumption that the consultant diagnoses problems and prescribes and sometimes implements solutions. In general, the assumption with coaching is that individuals or teams are capable of generating their own solutions, with the coach supplying supportive, discovery-based approaches and frameworks.

Mentoring—Mentoring, which can be thought of as guiding from one’s own experience or sharing of experience in a specific area of industry or career development, is sometimes confused with coaching. Although some coaches provide mentoring as part of their coaching, such as in mentor coaching new coaches, coaches are not typically mentors to those they coach.

Training—Training programs are based on the acquisition of certain learning objectives as set out by the trainer or instructor. Though objectives are clarified in the coaching process, they are set by the individual or team being coached with guidance provided by the coach. Training also assumes a linear learning path which coincides with an established curriculum. Coaching is less linear without a set curriculum plan.

Athletic Development—Though sports metaphors are often used, professional coaching is different from the traditional sports coach. The athletic coach is often seen as an expert who guides and directs the behavior of individuals or teams based on his or her greater experience and knowledge. Professional coaches possess these qualities, but it is the experience and knowledge of the individual or team that determines the direction. Additionally, professional coaching, unlike athletic development, does not focus on behaviors that are being executed poorly or incorrectly. Instead, the focus is on identifying opportunity for development based on individual strengths and capabilities.

Source: International Coach Federation FAQs

 

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The Douglas Psychotherapy Center
50 East Center St
Douglas, MI 49406
Email: contact@comeinandtalk.com

Web: websitesbykim.com